Let Your Victories Be YOUR Victories


Do you ever feel like someone is trying to “one-up” you? Someone is trying to steal that sunshine away from you? Someone is attempting to put you down while somehow lifting themselves up? We’ve all been there and we’ve all been surrounded by those people. Is this negative energy? Is this some form of toxicity we allow into our lives?

These past few days I’ve been grappling with the idea that I’m not going “hard enough,” or I’m not “fast enough,” or I’m not “strong enough,” or maybe me losing 90 pounds isn’t enough

If any of you have read my “I Was the Weight Loss Success Story” post, you’ll understand that I have been surrounded by people who wanted to take what was my glory and make it their own. They pushed me to fit their own agenda instead of focusing on me, the person, instead.

I’m here to to tell you that your victories are your victories alone. Own those victories. I don’t care if you lost a half a pound, 10 pounds, 40 pounds, 100 pounds, or even 150 pounds. Those are your victories to hold and to cherish. You did the work. You put yourself out on the line. You, and only you, can wear that triumphant medal around your neck.

And because of those victories, you don’t have to prove shit to anyone. The only person you have to prove shit to is yourself. Feel confident that you did it. Someone might come along and try to push you down and make you feel insignificant. What do I say to them: Piss off.

Keep fighting the good fight, my friends!

When Does Body Positivity Shift Into Glorifying Obesity?

I was overweight my entire life. I was thrown on diets, saw doctors and nutritionists at the tender age of 9. It was like I was told that there was something inherently wrong with me and something needed to be fixed. That is a feeling that no child should need to face.

My parents would tell me that I needed to watch what I ate, but that would only cause the adverse reaction. I would binge. I would sneak food. I would gorge myself. I claimed that I didn’t care what anyone else thought of me, but the truth was something completely different. 

The entire world tells you that you shouldn’t be fat, so I then tried to find ways to justify me being fat. I distinctly remember being in college and telling my dad that “being overweight is healthy!” I found guys that were only interested in dating a BBW and I submerged myself in that culture. I demanded that the rest of society change their standards and to accept my unhealthy lifestyle.

I will be the first person to tell you that I love the idea of being body positive. I am a strong believer in loving your body at any shape or size. I think it is really important to get a firm grip on loving yourself, let’s make no mistake about this. But when does body positivity shift into glorifying obesity? It is such a fine, delicate line. Since when did being body positive shift into being fat positive?

To me, loving your body is nourishing your body. Loving your body is providing it exercise. Loving your body is feeding it nutritious, healthy meals. Loving your body is making sure you aren’t damaging it. And I would argue that this entire body acceptance movement has shifted towards, “I am going to continue my lifestyle and claim that it’s just me loving myself. FU, society! Fat and proud!”

But let’s take the physical portion out of this equation. You can be fat, skinny, muscular, lanky, short, tall, morbidly obese, or as thin as a twig. It doesn’t change the fact that you need to be healthy. And to be healthy is doing all of those things that I listed before.

So, what is the solution here? Simply enough: Cut the bullshit. As my friend Jay from A Workout Routine says, “The solution isn’t to glorify it. The solution is to make the diet/exercise changes needed to fix it.”

Wait! That’s my face!

We’re inundated with messages from the media trying to sell us the latest fitness trends. We constantly see: “Buy this and never diet again!” “Why workout when you can eat THIS!” “Dr. Oz says this is the miracle pill! See why!” Doesn’t it just get overwhelming? Whatever happened to just good ol’ diet and exercise?

Then this happened.

Then this happened.

As you can see, that’s my latest progress picture. It’s being used on various Instagram accounts claiming that you can get ABS if you, I don’t know, buy their product.

I’ve talked about this openly on my Facebook, but I’ll discuss it here, too:

I did not use workout supplements. I did not have weight loss surgery. I did not use fat burners. I lost 90 pounds with pure diet and exercise.

Initially, I was extremely upset that I was being associated with this absolute nonsense, but the truth of the matter is is that I can’t do shit. From here on out, all of my progress pictures will have watermarks linking back to my website.

P.S. They are advertising that you can get abs like ME. Wait! I don’t even have abs! I’m the worst spokesperson alive!

P.S. If you’d like to follow me on Instagram, click HERE!

Positive Reinforcement is the BEST Reinforcement!



Good news, sports fans!

I’ve been kind of avoiding the scale because I didn’t think that it would really do me any good to get on there. Simply because if I hadn’t lost anything, I’d try to restrict and if I did lose something, well, maybe I’d still try to restrict. No winning here, you see.

So, I put on my big girl panties and I finally hopped on the scale last week for the first time since late May. And I was down 4.5 pounds. What! That means that I have lost 89 pounds. What!

And you know what this means? This means that me eating 1550 a day and being active and not restricting heavily can still mean that I can lose weight.

If anything, this is the best positive reinforcement ever. I’m really excited and I’m really proud of myself.

 Anything is possible if you go at it head on and be strong. You can do it.

Morning Stretches with Coffee

One of the things that I look forward to the most during the day is my morning cup of coffee and leg stretches.

When I was 18, I had a severely herniated disk that was pressing up against my sciatic nerve which was causing immense pain down my right leg. I had surgery to correct the problem, but I still occasionally feel some lingering sciatic pain possibly due to nerve damage. coffee-386878_640

What I have been doing for almost a month now is just stretching my legs out every single morning with my yoga strap. I feel like this has helped my legs immensely, as I hardly feel my sciatica anymore!

And what is there that I can really say about that morning cup of coffee? It’s fabulous and gives me that extra boost of energy to get my butt in the gym for an hour and a half!

What is something that you do that makes you feel rejuvenated and gives you a kickstart to the day?

30 Day Plank Challenge!

It’s August 1st. You know what that means? That means we get to set goals, stick with ‘em, and achieve them!

One of my best friends in the entire world, Lexi, is challenging all of her clients (she’s a personal trainer, of course!) and her friends to do what we call: The 30 Day Plank Challenge.

I’ll be in on this challenge. Are YOU in?

C'mon! It's not THAT difficult!

C’mon! It’s not THAT difficult!

Expanding Your Values

One thing that I’ve been working on a lot in therapy are values. No, no. I’m not talking about your ethics or anything like that. I’m talking about what makes you happy and authentic and genuine. 

I feel like during my weight loss excursion, my values shifted. Instead of seeing working out and fitness as something of value, I saw food being more of a value. My entire world changed to being obsessed with food: how I’m not eating it and when I can eat it next. I valued only the numbers that I burned instead of the numbers that I could lift.

Things that I am Trying to Value Now: 

1. My heart strength

2. My fitness strength

3. My mental strength

4. The concept that I don’t value food as much as I used to

5. My healthy self instead of my eating disordered self

What do YOU value? 


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